Moana (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
chosenbytheocean) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
sixthiterationlogs2017-08-01 01:20 pm
chosenbytheocean) wrote in sixthiterationlogs2017-08-01 01:20 pm
11 - Lost Heart [OPEN]
WHO: Moana
WHERE: 7I – Ocean
WHEN: August 3rd
OPEN TO: EVERYONE
WARNINGS: None
Sad Thoughts & Losses
Small earthquakes had begun to tremble through the two villages but Moana didn't pay them any attention. She crossed the breach and made her way towards the ocean that rested on the other side, hoping to find a friend waiting for her.
She stood at the shore, her feet bare while the wind tugged softly at her grass skirts. There was so much that Moana wanted to ask the ocean but she couldn't find her voice. She knew that it wouldn't reply to her, she was too far from the home that she knew. Frustration rose in her chest and she kicked at the water, sending thick droplets into the air around her.
"Why aren't you here!?" She yelled at the water before falling to her hands and knees. Everything hit her at once: the loss of her friends, the loss of the heart and the constant reminder of her failure that hung like a beacon around her neck. Moana began to cry softly, her body shaking as the tears streamed freely down her cheeks.
"I need you." She whispered to the ocean, her voice soft as she begged for some way to escape the crushing defeat that weighed heavily on her shoulders.
WHERE: 7I – Ocean
WHEN: August 3rd
OPEN TO: EVERYONE
WARNINGS: None
She stood at the shore, her feet bare while the wind tugged softly at her grass skirts. There was so much that Moana wanted to ask the ocean but she couldn't find her voice. She knew that it wouldn't reply to her, she was too far from the home that she knew. Frustration rose in her chest and she kicked at the water, sending thick droplets into the air around her.
"Why aren't you here!?" She yelled at the water before falling to her hands and knees. Everything hit her at once: the loss of her friends, the loss of the heart and the constant reminder of her failure that hung like a beacon around her neck. Moana began to cry softly, her body shaking as the tears streamed freely down her cheeks.
"I need you." She whispered to the ocean, her voice soft as she begged for some way to escape the crushing defeat that weighed heavily on her shoulders.
no subject
He kind of prefers abandoned buildings for his breakdowns, as far out from everyone as he can find. It's one of the draws of the new canyon: new information, the hope of some fucking change, and a certain level of solitude. If he laughs at the wrong time, if he chokes up out here, no one has to know.
That's probably what she expected too, and he holds to his position behind the rocks, wondering if he should come out or not. The old him would have. Robin would have a cape to wrap around her shoulders, and the confidence to conquer her fears. Something like that, anyway. But there's an older him, too, that's much closer to the surface. There's a kid who hid in his closet at the manor, sniffling into his hands until Alfred found him. Crying's for punks, he'd said, and Alfred--god how he misses Alfred--had answered, Master Timothy, I have never known you to be anything else.
Really, that decides it: looping back around the other side of the rocks, he lets it look like he's just walking up the shore, coming upon her suddenly. "Hey," he says, the concern genuine, if the surprise isn't; "are you okay? How'd you get all the way out here?"
no subject
Someone had told her that it might just be a very large lake but Moana didn't care. All Rivers ran into the ocean. That's what she'd always believed. Her fingers curled into the sand while the cold touch of the tide brushed against her hands and knees. The sand cemented around her limbs and then broke apart in clumps when she felt the strength to move. She had promised Ned that she'd keep trying but she didn't feel like she could.
Moana hadn't expected to see someone else out here. The small earthquakes made the pass dangerous thought it wasn't the sort of thing to deter Moana. If she wanted to do something, then she wouldn't let anything stop her, that was before now.
She sat back and quickly wiped the back of her hands across her cheeks. Specs of sand dotted her cheek but Moana didn't mind. She was used to sand and in a strange twisted way it was comfortable. "I walked. Through the breach." She brushed her palms against her island skirts before turning her head to look up at Tim. Her eyes were still puffy but she didn't know him and she didn't want him to worry about her. There were enough people worrying about her, that was why she came out this far in the first place.
"I'm fine." She lied, trying to force a lightness that she didn't feel into her words. Moana was not a good liar.
no subject
It's quiet enough he doesn't quite realize he's said it aloud, hunting the pockets of his scrubs for anything--kerchief, rag, scrap of paper--when he catches sight of her face. That it's paper is probably better than cloth--far as he can tell, it's salt water, and wouldn't he be an ass to soak something in that for her eyes. "Here," he says, thrusting his latest scrap paper forward, notes crumpled in his grip.
He'll make them up later. Maybe he'll actually remember it all, this time. "Just, here, you can wipe your face."
Handing it over, he digs his hands back into his pockets just to occupy them. "It's okay if you're not fine," he points out. "Do you want some company?"
no subject
"Thank you." She sniffed softly, turning to sit more comfortably on the sandy shore.
Her fingers rand through her hair, pushing the thick black mane over her shoulder so it wasn't in her way anymore. "Yeah. I was just--" What had she been doing?--Yelling at the ocean and then crying at it.
"Thinking."
no subject
She doesn't seem like a threat, but--last time he helped a lady in need, it didn't go so well for him. When Bruce took him in, he thought he'd be done sizing up everyone he met, wondering if he could outmaneuver them. Instead, Bruce taught him better ways to do both, stressed constant vigilance, and waking up in the fountain to no clear answers had made it all the more necessary.
Excuses, really: it's still a shitty way to think, finding some girl crying on the shore. "We don't really have this where I'm from," he tries, steering his own gaze out over the water. "I mean, we have beaches, but it's a lot of grimy docks and smoggy horizons, in my town."
no subject
Her toes curled into the sand making little toe shaped intends before the water washed them away. She liked the feel of the ocean even if it invited a wet sandiness to her lower half. "I've always felt close to the ocean." Her voice was soft but slowly gaining strength.
She wasn't sure what to say but she was silently grateful that she wasn't alone anymore. "My home was an island. I grew up near the ocean and always dreamed of a life on it." Her voice broke and it took her a few seconds before she could continue. "I've been here for awhile. Since winter." She didn't know the exact time but it felt like forever. "I've heard about cities and streets and people called hipsters." It felt so strange talking about it now.
"It's all hard to imagine. Not being able to see the ocean like this... I can't imagine it." She didn't want to imagine a world without an ocean. "It's silly, isn't it?"
no subject
It's less a coin toss than a balancing act, deciding how well the good about this place stacks against the bad. He hadn't been around for the big earthquake, but he's felt the little ones, and if there's some kind of regional or planet instability, they could all be in very big trouble, very fast.
"But I don't think it's silly. I can't imagine a universe without the place I left behind either. I just have to tell myself that it's still there, even if I'm not."
no subject
"My island..." She began while drawing a small family at the forefront of her picture in the sand. "My people, I know they're there but... I was supposed to save them and I wanted to save the people here too..." Moana stopped drawing when the tied rose and washed away her image.
"I failed. I can't help anyone." She turned her attention back to the ocean. "And if I tried to leave and sail across the ocean.... it's selfish." Selfish and dangerous because Moana still didn't know how to sail. Not to mention that the people keeping them here wouldn't want them to leave.
Re: Reply to your comment. [ sixthiterationlogs
For Tim, any desire to get back home and help is more to do with redemption than leaving loose ends. Bruce and Barbara wouldn't expect it of him, chasing down Harley, cleaning up any traps left in the ruins. They wouldn't expect--or allow--him to put on the costume at all.
Of course it's still there, still a thing that exists. Bruce will have it in a case by now, and someone else will come along and assume Robin died. Maybe he did.
Maybe he did even if Tim gets home in one piece, any more sane than he left it. "I think if you wanted to sail out along the edges of this thing, you could meet it all halfway," he suggests, trying not to sink deeper into the thought. His own fingers draw a ragged line of a shore around his crossed legs. "Puts you back on the water, and gets information for the people here, maybe information that saves them."
no subject
She felt it in her heart.
Moana was reminded of her father's warnings, how dangerous the sea could be and then of the storm that she had been caught in on her way to find Maui. It never deterred her in the past but now she felt her uncertainties bubble uncomfortably in her stomach. What if there was nothing out there? What if she didn't make it back?
"We won't find anything out if we do nothing." It wasn't clear if she was talking to herself or Tim. She turned towards him, looking a bit more eager as she leaned forward. "Will you help me build a boat?" They needed logs and tools to strip the wood. Moana thought about bringing a small canoe through the pass except that it'd be dangerous with the recent earthquakes.
no subject
Why not now? What better thing does he have to do, if he's already detouring to sit with her on the beach?
"I mean, yeah, I can try. It's not really something I've done before, but everyone else who's ever been stranded on an island seems to figure it out at some point."
no subject
"I have repaired boats before. If you can help me get the pieces, I know I can put one together. My people were once voyagers, it's part of my history and I know we can do it."
The crying girl appeared to be gone. Those tears now replaced by unwavering confidence and hope. It wasn't that Moana thought she had it all figured out, she knew she didn't, but she was reminded that she wasn't alone. She could keep going, with the people she's met at her side. It was better than sitting and doing nothing. Over time, she might get used to loss, but for now she'll carry that pain and heartache with her and she'll continue forward.