sixthiterationlogs | If it can feel, it should feel.

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If it can feel, it should feel.

WHO: Niska Elster
WHERE: Hospital | Police Station
WHEN: February 18
OPEN TO: All!
WARNINGS: A kind, gentle Niska (aka, Off Colour shenanigans)

Hospital

She's in the middle of one of her shifts at the hospital when things go awry.

Niska's cynicism immediately tells her that something is being done to punish her for her continued attempts to mine the code in the bunker and expose whatever they've been doing. The video messages had only been a small bit of it. Watching her device reset itself after a blue screen that she knows far too much about, she's on her sharpest watch as it begins to reboot.

Only, something is different.

The orange is gone. In its place, white. She hasn't spent much time on the colours on the devices, exactly. She's reviewed names and people who have been with them and then gone, but she never spends that much time on the actual colours. Perhaps she should have, because then she'd understand why she instantly begins to wonder why she's been spending so much time on research in the hospital and the lab.

She should be treating patients, she should be helping people. That's why she was made, isn't it? David Elster built her to be useful and warm, kind and caring, and she'd fought it for so long, but that's her initial purpose. Setting down her microscope slides and forgetting that, she goes back to the vitamins, only this time, it's not to feel useful for herself or superior. She's doing it because she genuinely cares if the people around her get sick or not.

Glancing up when she sees someone new, she smiles warmer than she ever has here in the settlement. "Do you need help? I'd be happy to assist," she says, pushing off her chair to head over before anyone can beat her to it.

Police Station

Instead of going home immediately after her shift, Niska does something she never has before.

She's never needed to eat, but it now occurs to her that the animals within the cells will certainly need their meal. Honestly she's not sure why she never thought of it, but after a quick stop at the inn, she heads into the adapted barn with a bucket of grains, greens, and other little treats that she'd picked up. Her device white instead of orange, she pays little mind to it. The animals are clearly more of a concern now, and she approaches them to tend to their needs.

Soothing them, feeding them, patting them. In this moment, she's far more caring and maternal than she has been in years. Seven years, if she's honest. She had never been created to be a mother to Leo, but she'd possessed the necessary traits, ones that simply got buried too deep.

"Easy now," she soothes one of the animals when it seems to panic, at the sound of new footsteps. "It's just a new friend with us. That shouldn't be cause for worry at all," she says, turning to give her new visitor a warm smile. "Come in, I was just going to see if could get any milk from the goats today."

If Mia could see her now, she'd laugh until her battery died. As it happens, Niska isn't even aware that there's something to laugh at, so she keeps on, helpful and smiling and warm -- all the things she hasn't been since the first time she was used for something so very apart from her intended purpose.

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Niska's pushed her hair into a braid to keep it out of the way, knowing that she must look like one of the Swiss Maid synths they love so much in certain parts of the world, but she catches sight of the man and offers an inviting smile.

She doesn't have to do this alone, after all. It'd be silly to insist that no one help her. "You can," she agrees. "I bet it's even easier than you ever thought. Come here," she says, patting the stool. "I'll help you through it."

Well that was easy.

North does in fact move closer, considering the stool. It's probably not going to be comfortable given how long his legs are, but he sits as directed, reaching up to pat the nanny goat briefly.

"You're sure she's not going to bite me or something like that?"

Niska's responding laugh has none of the sarcasm or disgust associated with it that she might normally have, instead simply open and warm. "Only if you do something terribly mean and she's trying to defend herself," she guarantees. "We'll do our best not to give her a reason to fight back, though."

She extends a hand to him, before he starts milking. "I'm Niska," she says, sweet as anything with her smile.

"North Dakota," he smiles, taking her hand and shaking it firmly. "You have no idea how excited Theta is that you're letting us do this."

So maybe the word choice is weird, could easily be read as insanity, or some odd quirk, multiple personalities even? Actually, North feels really bad about the fact that it could taken wrong. So he smiles briefly, an awkward sort of smile as he turns his attention back to the goat.

"I should explain I guess. I've got an AI in my head. And he, Theta, really likes animals."

"Theta?" She's not so sure what a Theta is, because he'd just said that his name is North Dakota. Is it an animal that she hasn't seen yet in hiding? Perhaps a dog or a smaller pet?

He goes on, though, and Niska is taken aback. It's not the concept of AI, after all (she is one), but the fact that they could somehow be together. Perhaps it's like Mia and Anita, though she doesn't see the similarity. "You mean to say that you have a fully fledged AI in your head? How do you share the space? The brainpower?"

"It would be inaccurate to say fully fledged. Theta is only an AI fragment. But he's definitely in my head, and his chip is missing so he can't even withdraw any. But my neural lattice must be intact for him to be here still," North smiles as he strokes the goat. "And he loves animals."

Not that North is going to care too much if she judges him for having an AI. At the very least, they can get to be this close to a goat. Even if this place is a bit sharp on his sense of smell, he's content for it anyway.

"It must be an incredibly complex lattice to allow for that to happen without you going mad," Niska remarks, though the implication there is that he hasn't. She doesn't know him, but she trusts him that he isn't. Which is odd. Isn't it?

Doesn't she usually reserve judgment in situations like this? It feels like she should, and yet, she lets it slide away. "We're going to work the milk out slowly, we don't want to scare her."

"Very complex, and experimental," North agrees. "But a lot of his processing power comes from currently unused portions of my brain. But there you go."

Still, he's a bit intrigued by her comment there. How would she know?

Can we talk to her about it?

Maybe after we help with the goat, T.

"Okay, that sounds right. I just don't know how to do it. At all. Never seen anything like a goat or cow in person."

"I haven't done this in many years, but I don't forget easily." She doesn't forget at all, but just because she feels like she wants to help people and be open and kind doesn't mean she's started to trust everyone. She's still sane. She still knows the dangers.

"I can't imagine that you have that much unused places in your brain. You both must be so stifled," Niska insists, concerned.

"There's enough, and like I said, he's not a full AI," North answers. He's lived with Theta for a while, he knows how to handle it. "I mean, it's not as easy without his chip or my armor, but you do what you can. So... care to show me?"

Don't forget? Yeah, he can understand that some, but he doesn't think he can do much about that. What he can do is enjoy milking this goat. Teach him, Niska.

Niska gestures to some of the feed that she'd brought in. "You're going to want to make sure that the animal has something to eat," Niska advises, because if the goat gets too finnicky or starts to bolt and kick, then it's not going to go well.

"We'll do a brief wash of the udders, and then you're going to need to gently squeeze after you've trapped some milk in, but never yank. You won't like what happens if you yank," she's compelled to warn.

"I can't imagine a person would like it if you just yanked at body parts either," North agrees and he looks toward the feed. Should he get back up from the stool.

Think you should ask her to show you how first.

Worried about getting kicked?

I can't cut myself off of your pain receptors right now.

"Some people do," Niska confesses, not wanting to judge anyone (really? Her programming is going to remember that), but then again, she also doesn't want to be the one to inflict hurt, especially if she doesn't need to.

She watches, patiently, but North does't seem to be doing anything, so she feels like she must have done something wrong in the explaining. "I'm sorry, did I need to give you more?" she asks, and there's genuine worry in her voice that somehow she's failed him.

North turns just a little red at that comment. That isn't something that he wants to talk or think about thanks. Then he looks to her, almost ready to gesture for her to do move.

"You have the feed bucket. And I'm sitting here. Maybe you'd take care of feeding her. Is there a specific way I'm supposed to use my fingers? I've never done this before."

Niska moves to her feet and walks to the other side, boots making a satisfying noise as she takes the bucket. "You go and sit. I think you're going to enjoy that part more than this." She's teasing, because it will be more difficult, but at the same time, it's also going to be much more rewarding.

Isn't that the point of all this? That they're going to help out each other and feel so wonderful about it? "There's a first time for everything, after all."

"Indeed there is," North agrees, shifting on the stool. "Theta's excited to work with animals. I might have my job here decided for me if this doesn't go terribly."

Which would be an amusing prospect, wouldn't it? He'd never really involved himself with animals growing up, so to have himself so immediately tied to them here would definitely be an amusing choice on their next pass through life.

Niska kneels down by the goat's mouth to feed it, holding out a palmful at a time, smiling at him even if she's intrigued and wary about this theta in ways that she doesn't want to think about. She's sure that it will be fine, and she shouldn't fuss.

"Well, I'd be happy if you decided you liked it. Goat's milk for everyone," she insists cheerfully.

"Healthy and delicious. I hope."

He laughs and settles his attention on the goat. Carefully. Is there a gesture he should be using? He doesn't even know.

"Is there a way that I work my hands on the... teats? I think that's the right word."

She glances up and even though she's feeling warmer and far more helpful, her warning of, "Don't squeeze," is as sharp as Niska usually is. "You're going to gently cup the teat to start expressing the milk and then gently knead it out. Then, repeat," she says, palm out to offer it to the goat while she speaks to North.

With the additional information given and Theta to monitor his pressure help him find an effective motion sooner than just mere trial and error, North finally puts his hands to the teats. The first two attempts mostly get the goat shifting in a touch of annoyance at his failure. But soon he gets the first squirt of milk and he isn't sure who the smile on his face belongs to, Theta or himself.

"I did it," he beams at Niska before repeating the action. And soon he's got a pretty steady motion down.

She's just as proud, which should feel odd and strange, but it doesn't. Instead, she's simply going to keep going with this strange feeling that she wants to encourage this onwards and nurse this feeling of warmth towards humanity.

Maybe she just had to stop fighting it?

"Yes, you did," she praises. "Which means that you're going to certainly keep helping with the chores, I hope," she can't help but suggest, with an amused look on her face.

"Oh that's definitely going to happen. Did I mention that Theta loves animals?" North asks with a smile, looking up at her and letting his hands work on their own. "And since we can't get a dog, it's the closest we can get to working with animals. And I needed something to do here."

And fostering life like this seems pretty good to him.

"Did they program the AI with specific traits?" She doesn't want to appear that she only wants to ask questions to learn more, as that would be very much a selfish thing, but it still is something that she's interested in.

Perhaps if she keeps talking and learning about him, it won't seem so self-centred. "Love of dogs, hatred of something else, like rainstorms or something of the like?"

"Program him with them? No. They're their own people. Their personalities are their own. Within a certain part of the AI community they can be pretty different, as colorful and unique as people, even if they do still have programs they have to follow some. But Theta's about as different from his brothers as I am from my twin."

So there you go, that's what it is. Theta who trusts people too easy, and who plays with the need to be depended on. Who was scared of what people might do to him, and who hated the darkness and being alone.

North got it. He loves it.

It's everything that she'd wanted to hear from a human and Niska gets emotional for a moment. Her throat tightens up and her smile is soft. "It's big of you to say that. Not everyone feels that way about artificial life," she points out, because she's been fighting against it for so long.

It had nearly taken Astrid from her, simply because of people's hatred. "You must be grateful to always have someone with you, then."

If it can feel, it should feel.

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She already had him sit so just assuming she didn't say that now

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