sixthiterationlogs | howling in the hills

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howling in the hills

WHO: Vasquez
WHERE: The Woods
WHEN: November 27 - December 2
OPEN TO: OTA
WARNINGS: Animal Transformation

What Great Fur You Have

After he'd healed from his illness, Vasquez probably should have been more thankful for his good health.

Instead, he's quickly remembered all the secrets about himself that he had given up. He remembered confessing about his fears, showing his weakness, and worse, he thinks he remembers telling Faraday things that he'd vowed to keep inside. For sure, he shouldn't have told him how Rose Creek had ended, because thinking about that gory conclusion wasn't good for anyone. When he'd healed, he'd marched himself down to that bunker where it had a machine for powers and he did what any cowardly man who never took responsibility for anything or anyone would do.

He turned himself into a wolf and went out into the wilderness, knowing that so long as he was an animal, he wouldn't have to talk about any feelings.

Unfortunately, it also means that you don't get to eat so easy and raw venison is not something Vasquez likes, which is why there's a wolf sitting outside of a house, making whining sounds and pawing at the window, pleading for whatever food is inside. He's not eating raw meat, not unless he absolutely has to, and he didn't even do that when he'd been half-starving in a dead man's cabin.

Human Skin

Eventually, he knows that this transformation won't last forever. When he'd gone to the machine, it had said a week, and counting the days, Vasquez knows that his time is quickly coming up. Of course, he didn't exactly plan it completely, because when the week is up, he's nowhere near the clothes he'd hidden, which leaves him standing near the outskirts of the south village (more in it than out), hands over his personal area, cheeks flush with red.

This is definitely not how he had intended to end this, and he knows that getting all the way back to the house isn't an option. Even stealing something isn't such a good idea, because he doesn't want to burst into anyone's house like this.

They might get the wrong idea.

So, it looks like a kind gesture is all that's going to save Vasquez, and a little humiliation until then. "Morning," he greets the nearest person with a smile, fucking freezing. "Maybe, I don't know, you have a jacket you can give me? I think it would be best for everyone if I could get some clothes."

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"Not with him," Vasquez says firmly, because that's a lot of awkward and uncomfortable things there that he'd rather just leave in the past. If he's a wolf, then no conversations happened. So what if he snuck into Faraday's bedroom the one night and curled up on the end of his bed.

That's for him to know, and no one else. Breathing relief, he lopes the last few steps, his stride as long as he can make it, and gets there. "Good, because I know I have a good ass, but not everyone needs to see it so much."

"With who?" Kat asked as she pulled out a dark pair of teal jeans and a bright teal button down. The underwear was white and plain and one of the standard pairs that came in their starter packs. It's clear that someone else used to live in this room except that now everything had a thin layer of dust on it. "There and there is a pair of converse right here. I'll make us some tea down stairs."

She flashed him a smile before disappearing towards the kitchen.

She had a lot of dry herbs and while Vasquez might not want to sit around and talk, Kat thought that he ought to warm up after walking naked outside for however long he'd been standing there. She didn't want him to catch a cold.

"Someone from home," he says, yanking the clothes and working to wriggle into them, zipping up the jeans on top of the underwear, already feeling more himself, even as he works to get the shirt on. He follows along, stomach rumbling and reminding himself that he hasn't eaten in ages.

"You have food, too?" he asks hopefully, because tea will only go so far. "I think the last time I ate was two days. I might have been a wolf, but I didn't want to even attempt raw meat."

"I have some dried meat I had taken from the inn." She slipped around the island in the middle of the kitchen and opened a cabinet. It took her awhile to find what she was looking for but she returned to the small island with a plate of dried smoked meats. Kat didn't try to take food from the inn but she had just-in-case food. "Here."

She turned to continue prepping the tea before continuing their previous conversation. "Someone you didn't expect to see?" That was her guess.

He heads straight for the food, even if the tea's securely in his hand, seeing as he's thirsty and hungry and cold, and his now-human brain is struggling to figure out which of those things he wants to be dealing with first, if he's honest.

"Someone that was dead," he agrees, which is not to say that he hadn't been pleased to see Faraday. "I'm glad he's here, but when he was sick, I said things. I said a lot of things," he says, with a heavy intonation and nod, as if that'll be enough to give her a hint as to how bad it was.

Kat watched him eat with an amused expression. She didn't exactly smile but it was nice to see that he was feeling better. "Something like a confession?" She guess, uncertain why it was such a big deal. Maybe all men preferred to pretend that they didn't have feelings.

She didn't really understand it because she didn't have all the details but Vasquez was a good guy. She didn't think he had anything to worry about, even if his life was awkward for a few weeks.

"Worse," is what Vasquez says, shovelling another few forkfuls in his mouth. "I told him the truth." He told him all about his fate and that's not something people want to know, especially when it's as bad as Faraday's had been.

He knows none of these things are his fault, but they're not good. Not for a man like Faraday. "I also did confess a little something, I think. I might have told him that I didn't hate him so much."

Understatement.

"The truth is hard but is it really so bad?"

Heat sank into her fingers as she held her mug close to her chest. She took a small sip but enjoyed the warmth more than she had the tea. "I think this world is a place of new beginnings. It might only last while we're here but it's worth holding onto."

Her head tilted curiously to the side. "Don't you think?"

"In this case? Would you want to hear that you're dead, back home, and if you ever leave here, there's nothing but the afterlife?" Hell, probably, in either his and Faraday's cases, because he might not want to be religious, but that old holdout is hard to push down completely.

The rest, the part about what Vasquez feels, he thinks he can settle that. Faraday doesn't do that with other men, he can move on, but the dying part? That's hard. "He has nothing to have if this ends. I don't have him either, if he goes."

"Yes." Kat looked at him now, her dark emerald green eyes steady and her voice confident. "Because no matter how you look at it, it's still more time. Don't focus on the past or what's behind you but your lives here. It doesn't matter how short a time it is because it's yours to shape how you want."

There will always be a time to say goodbye but why let that stop you from living a life you want? Kat's seen so much sadness and she didn't want to see that here. This world was a start of something new.

Even if it was only for a little while.

More time. That's the other part of this. More time is good and all, but is more time really useful if Vasquez doesn't get what he wants out of him? He wants so much more, but he doesn't think that Faraday is a position to give that, which makes him feel wary about asking.

"So, here, I get his friendship, that's it. Then, when I go home, I lose him again," he says. Already, he feels dulled, because he sees how this works. It's bad for Faraday, but it's worse for him, because he has to live without it.

"Well," She leaned forward, resting her elbows against the counter as she spoke. "What can you live with and what can't you?" Kat didn't think that Vasquez would force his emotions on another person but she knows how lonely it was to live while your heart belonged to someone who didn't deserve it.

Even now Kat disliked herself for the way she felt.

If she was going to love someone, couldn't it be with someone who loved her back? Who thought she was worth something...

"When you figure that out, you'll know what to do."

Vasquez isn't sure what he wants to do other than smoke and eat right now, maybe sulk about his shitty luck. After all, why is it his fault that he lived and Faraday died? If they'd both just gone out together, then no one would have cared.

Then, here would have been both of their second chances. "You sound like you know this," he says, gesturing to her. "Knowing what to live with."

"I do." Her eyes softened as she cast a wistful gaze down into her tea cup. "I fell in love with someone but it was a mistake. He erased my memory, so I'd forget and he used me. Even after all that, I still care about him." She knew that it was stupid. "It's something I live with but it's lonely."

Kat had thought she'd gotten over it but it was harder when she was so far away from the life she was used too.

"It's worse when you see them everyday and know that they don't feel the same way."

Right now, that's where Vasquez is. The trouble is that he could get an answer one way or the other, but only if he asks the question. Until then, he's being a coward and not asking because he doesn't want to know. He can pretend, maybe, that it could still all work out.

"I have someone now," he admits. "And it's not the same feelings as I have for the other man, but it's someone. I'm being shitty to both of them, I think." He should just go talk to Faraday, but fuck if he isn't scared.

Kat didn't blink. "That is shitty of you. Does your someone know?" She wasn't being judgmental but from an outside perspective, Vasquez was being a dick. Emotions were unavoidable at times but he should at least be honest with those around him.

"If you wait too long, you'll end up hurt and possibly with no one." Her tone was gentle but honest.

He nods his head. "Yes, I was doing this with him before he got here, but it's not serious, no feelings. Not like that," he clarifies, because Bobo is definitely a good friend, but there's no depth of want or need like he feels for Faraday.

"Can't just be a wolf forever?" he quips, trying to make light of it, but he knows what she means. "I should probably have to go talk to him, don't I?"

Kat smiled sympathetically. "It'd be easier but no. You can't be a wolf forever." She paused thoughtfully and then gestured towards the kitchen. "If you'd like a place to run away too, why not come here? It's just me and I wouldn't mind the company."

She took a sip of her tea and then continued. "But yes, you should talk to them. Be honest. I'm sure it'll work out."

It would be so much easier if he were, but then he would miss out on so many human things that he loves. The food, the sex, and even just the pleasure of skin on skin curling up at night. "I could use a place to come and talk to someone. Friends hasn't been something I'm used to having," Vasquez admits.

The talking part, he knows he'll need to do, but he still hates that it has to happen. "If it doesn't, I'll be here with some of my liquor to complain about it."

Kat smiled at him. "You're always welcome here. Though I might ask you to start bringing food with that liquor." Her smile widened a bit and her emerald green eyes glittered with mirth. If he was going to stop by, she'd make sure that there was enough food for him as well as herself.

"I usually keep the backdoor unlocked."

Even if she wasn't home, he could come to the house and escape.

"I have enough from the butcher shop, I could manage," he says, thinking that Bobo would like him enough to give him some scraps to use, even if he'd probably give him a glare. He laughs and thinks that if he's a wolf, he's not getting to use the backdoor, so he'd best be human.

"Maybe I won't be so much of an idiot next time I sneak into your house for food," he even suggests cheerfully, though he's not so convinced yet.

"I'll make sure to keep some clothes on hand unless you are." Kat smiled at him. She'd install a doggy door if he wanted her too. She didn't really have guests and she enjoyed having Vasquez around. He had his own quirks but he was also very similar to people she knew from the city.

"I plan to try and stay here through winter. Unless the snow gets too bad then I'll be at the inn." Which meant that he could run away to her house but she wouldn't be here and it wouldn't be warm. Kat hoped she had enough firewood to last the winter but she wasn't sure.

Vasquez nods, because he'd been at the inn long enough, but now he needs a little bit of something different. There had been too many people there and it had been good for him to be there, at least until he found his footing, but with Bobo and Faraday, he's better.

At least, he thinks he'll be better.

That requires talking to Faraday and probably to Bobo. "I'll come visit the wise woman whenever I can," he guarantees, because it's not all flattery when it's true.

Kat rolled her eyes but was smiling at the compliment. She didn't get them often and it was hard to believe that it was any more than vain flattery but she had a feeling that Vasquez wasn't the sort of person who complimented someone unless he really meant it.

"Just remember what I said about the food." Though she'd try and keep a little more food in the house anyway. It was difficult to grab extra food from the inn. She had tried setting traps in the woods behind her house but they hadn't been yielding much and the one time it did work, the animal had been alive and Kat couldn't bring herself to kill it.

She had grown up in a city and hadn't had to see where hamburgers came from.

"You can stay for as long as you like but I should check on my plants in the other room." She moved them inside before the cold hit and she was trying to keep them alive. If Kat had to live off vegetation, then she would.

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howling in the hills

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