sixthiterationlogs | There you were, with that look on your face

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There you were, with that look on your face

WHO: Rinoa Heartilly
WHERE: Bunker, Hot Springs, outside House 16
WHEN: November 2nd and then the few days after
OPEN TO: Bunker for Squall, OTA to the others!
WARNINGS: TBD

Bunker, closed to Squall Leonhart

She comes to very slowly. Rinoa might have gone in and out of consciousness for longer than she knew, or that's how it felt. This wasn't the first time she was so groggy and confused that time had no real meaning. Dark eyes slowly opened and then closed, unable to focus too much on what's in front of her. Where was she? Her hand reached out and hit something solid, and it stung, leading her to whimper and pull it back. No, this was all wrong, this couldn't happen to her again. No more tubes, no more containments, no more sorceresses.

Rinoa started to flail, confused and stuck, when abruptly it seemed to open, letting her tumble out and into the room. This all felt like serious deja vu, because she was only falling for what seemed like a very long second before she collapsed into waiting arms. This time, though, she couldn't stand back up, but merely crumbled to the ground, clinging to the familiar body. "Squall?" she whispered.

The Hot Spring, later

Rinoa was curious to get to know this village, but she stayed overall within the boundaries of what was recommended. Still unsettled and thrown off by the experience, she needed a little space to unwrap her brain and breathe easy. She hadn't heard about the hot spring or what they were capable of, all she knew was they looked peaceful and nice and she decided to sit own next to them. She took off her shoes and set them aside, letting her feet dangle in. She reached down to take some of the water and rubbed her face with it.

She was unfortunately not someone who was very aware of her surroundings, so anyone could easily walk up to her or sneak up on her, and she'd never know.

Outside of House 16

The one thing she absolutely was all for about this place was an actual house! Rinoa lived with the SeeD and she tried not to complain about being constantly interrupted or a living quarter that was nothing like what she grew up in. She loved her friends and the others, but there was just something about having an actual room. Multiple rooms! And a kitchen. It made her miss home and her father so intensely she never expected it, but at the same time, it was comfortable.

She replaced her gray scrubs very quickly with shades of blue, as it was her most comfortable shade. At the moment she was cheerfully sweeping out the indoor of the house. No one had lived in it any time recently, from what she could tell, and Squall certainly wasn't going to think of that. She was going to need to clean and maybe set up some nicer living areas for them. She was in good spirits though, dark eyes bright, smiling up at the sun.

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He nodded at her first assessment. It was more than long enough to grow out his hair that long. It was long enough to build two towns and fight a few major battles. But how much he said about the whole experience was in her hands for now.

He nodded smartly, getting back to his feet and offering his hand to help her up. "Yes. There are houses here for us. I'll take you to mine...ours." He felt comfortable taking it as a given that she would stay with him.

He was mostly silent on the way back, because they did need to talk about a lot of things in some place she would feel comfortable and he would feel alone. Thankfully, the sight of the village would probably make her feel a lot better than the creepiness of the bunkers.

"This is it," he said, the cute porch looking welcoming in a very bizarre situation.

Rinoa would have given him quite the look if he had implied they wouldn't be staying together. She didn't want to be an entire house apart in this scary new place. He'd be lucky if he was allowed out of eye line of her for a little while. She somehow lost him again and didn't even know! She was grateful to get out of that really unnerving area and up into light and what felt like a strange but at least normal-seeming place.

"Oh!" She stared at the house and smiled. "I love it." She missed houses. This wasn't her mansion back home but all the better for that. It was always too big and easy to get lost in. After her mother died, all she saw was empty space. This was so much more her speed than apartments in the garden, although she didn't complain about it back home. Staying with Squall and their friends meant accepting the garden as her home, and she did. But being stuck here for a little while in a cute house? It could be worse.

She pulled him into the house and planned on doing an entire tour later, and to see what they would need from there. But for now, Rinoa sat down on the love seat in what appeared to be their new living room, and ran her shaking hands through her hair again. It was drying now at least. "You're going to have to tell me eventually, you know." She glanced over to him, serious. "Whatever you're not telling me. So you might as well now."

He felt a little bit of pride when she approved of the house. He hadn’t done anything other than claim it and dust out the rooms, but it was nice to have a hand in giving her something amidst the insanity. The house might be the only thing she liked.

Rather than sit down, Squall leaned against the wall—typical—and thought about his reply. It might as well be time to tell her everything since she wouldn’t be happy otherwise, but there was just so much. He didn’t want to leave out anything important, but he also didn’t want to bore her with details of Cid’s experiments or Yuffie’s wild ideas. But there was something almost like a smile when he thought of his comrades from that world. They made a pretty good team.

“Our world is not the only world that exists. Here, you’ll find people from very strange places. We’ve been brought from home to wherever this is by some powers.” He liked to imagine the NORG and beating them up. “But as I’ve said, this isn’t my first time in this sort of...hub world. I was once in a place we called Traverse Town, where people arrived after their worlds had been overrun by monsters called Heartless.” Meaning he had failed his world—his Garden, his home—in protecting them from Heartless. That still stung, and it was heard in his tone. “But we—myself and a few comrades from other worlds. Aerith, Yuffie, Cid, Merlin, Mickey, Sora, Donald, Goofy.” He didn’t need to say all their names, but he personally did. He was going to remember them. “We made progress, got a world back and rebuilt. It was attacked by things called Nobodies, but...it was okay. We — Sora, really — won.” At least for the moment. Things were looking bright. And now he’s here.

Rinoa gave him her full attention and listened. As she did, her expression slowly but surely started to fall and grow serious. That sounded terrible, and also great, to hear Squall made friends and chose to work closely with people again. He came such a long way from the isolated man he was. She noted all the names he mentioned; they mattered a lot to him, she could tell that, although they were complete strangers to her. And that was the part she was struggling with in the end. Because when he said we, he didn't mean the two of them. He meant himself and those other people. It was clear that she was not a part of it, which on one hand she was fine with, because thinking about him with some other Rinoa was panic-inducing. And confusing.

"I'm glad you and your friends won. You're very good at saving the day, you know." Her smile was forced. "Squall." She was struggling to figure out where to start. She has so many concerns and fears at the moment, about what did or did not happen, and she ran fingers through her hair. "How long were you there?" A battle that intense, with that many people, it couldn't be a few weeks. Or a month. And his hair was different and there were details that stood out to her more now. He changed, subtly, in appearance, but she knew his face almost as well as her own. "How long has it been since you saw me?"

The name matters a lot to him, and remembering them meant even more. That was a lesson he had first learned when facing the sorceress in Time Compression--when Rinoa had saved him. It seemed ridiculous but it worked: just remember. Whether you saw someone again or not, they were always connected by memory.

It was a mental anchor on his hardest days.

He tried to look amused her joke, but he could tell how upset she was. He really didn't want to upset her. He was hoping he might even be proud of him and how much he had done. But she was concerned about the time, and he wasn't sure whether he was surprised.

He thought about it before replying, "Six years." Something like that. He looked up at the ceiling. "I went by 'Leon.' I was never sure I was going to see any of you again. But I thought of you every day, Rinoa."

Rinoa's face morphed into open horror, eyes widening and then filling immediately with tears. She's not someone good at controlling her emotions, and while at times she wished she could, especially when it used to frustrate him, she simply can't. Six years. Six years without her and in this other world. They haven't even known each other half of that amount of time. So much less than that. She used to imagine the two of them in five years, ten years, twenty years, and maybe it was romantic idealism to see them together that far away, but she did. Now six of those were lost to him. To them.

"Six years." Rinoa didn't know how to cope with the enormity. Was it selfish her first thoughts were about them? He went through so much, and all she could think about was herself. She took in some long deep breaths to stop herself from hyperventilating, running both hands through her drying hair. "I'm ... I'm sorry, Squall. I don't know ... that must have been hard. I know how hard it was for you to finally feel like you were happy and in a good place at the Garden." He was starting to get comfortable as a leader, surrounded by his new family, his friends. He struggled so much finding his place and trusting that it was real. It was taken away from him after all they went through.

She wanted to go to him, but she had a question, and it was hard to say, it was impossible to think. She swallowed past something painful in her throat, glancing over to him with tears shimmering in her eyes. "Do you still ...." Six years, he said. He thought of her every day, but that didn't mean she was the same to him. Seifer wasn't the same to her, and they hadn't been broken up nearly as long. "Love me?" It was whispered because after how much it took to win his heart, it could all be lost now, and she wasn't ready to cope. But she knew Squall would never lie, even as a kindness.

Squall missed Rinoa's initial reaction, which was the reason he was staring up at the ceiling. It was in her nature to be emotional, and he had grown to appreciate that, but he wasn't sure he could stomach any sort of hurt on her face right now. Even though he technically hadn't caused it, he still felt like he was to blame.

He forced himself to look to her when she started to reply, and he could see how close she was to tears, and that hurt more than anything else. He wasn't going to say it hadn't been hard. "What happened in Garden prepared me. You all gave me strength."

He wasn't surprised by her concern for him, but he in no way expected her next question. He thought that was already obvious, but maybe she wasn't as adept at reading Squall as they thought. Or maybe she was just still a young woman who needed assurance because things were crazy. They had only just begun a relationship in her mind. Maybe he seemed weird for still loving her, for still fighting to get back to her. Because finding her was always his goal.

He ignored that nagging doubt that criticized his feelings to this day and stepped forward, kneeling in front of her to make sure he had her full attention. "Rinoa, of course I still love you. I will love you for the rest of my life, no matter what happens." His face was very earnest, especially for Squall. "But if I've changed too much in six years..." Go ahead and break his heart, Rinoa. A specter of his old issues with abandonment twisted his stomach.

It was a lot of information to take in all at once. This situation was confusing, but him being from a different time was harder. She doesn't know what she would have done, if it was her so out of time. It's not something she wants to think about. Her love for Squall was the strongest thing she'd ever known in her life. It framed her entire world once it happened, and they only survived what they did because of how much they loved one another. It was the sort of epic romantic story that she read as a child and dreamed about. It was harder than she dreamed, for sure. The fact they fought so hard for their happy ending was what made it stronger.

His words did make her heart hurt less, although she was crying now in a mixture of pain and relief. Living with a Squall who wasn't in love with her? Eventually Rinoa would be determined to win his heart again, and dedicate her life to doing just that. She was stubborn. But it would wreck her first. It was his own flash of insecurity that had her shaking her head and she gave a strangled laugh. "You idiot, I'm the one who fell in love with you first." She was the one who was only dancing with him a short time ago. He had six years to fall out of love with her.

She ran a hand through his longer hair, honestly she liked it, and looked closely at his eyes. She realized her feelings by the first time she felt like she was falling right into his eyes. Like the song her mother sang. "Of course you've changed, and you're going to tell me about it, but I don't know how to not love you. I'm just ... making sure that's still what you want."

Being called an idiot might normally ruffle his feathers, but this time, he only felt relief. He had never imagined romance. He craved family so much that he preferred to push it away because he knew he would only lose it. He pushed her away for the same reason, but then everything made him rely on people. And Rinoa was a big part of that--her rebellion, her enthusiasm, her optimistic naivety.

It had taken him so long to open up that he wasn't going to get over her so quickly. Not even six years.

"I don't think I've changed too much. You'll have to tell me," he said. He was more expressive, more adaptable, but he was still Squall. He didn't really think he would have changed so much she would abandon him. He hoped. "But of course I still love you, Rinoa, and I want to be with you. I don't carry someone all the way to Esthar for no reason." He cupped her cheek in one hand, and for a steady swordsman, his hand was shaking just a little. He didn't really know what to do with all his feelings for her.

Rinoa laughed, although it had a hint of a sob too, because she so desperately counted on his love once she won it. It wasn't really typical, in the romance stories, that the woman was the one who chased and courted, but she was happy to do it because it was so very them. His reluctance was part of the charm at first, when she realized it wasn't dislike toward her that was driving him, but awkwardness. Now she thought everything he did was charming. The sweetness in his small smiles, the care he put into working with the SeeD, the way he let her lean on him.

"I love you and want to be with you always." She cupped his face and kissed him deeply. Now his passion for her in the bunker made a little more sense. After six years apart, she would want to kiss him right away too. The kisses were still new and glorious to her, and at least now she knew they hadn't lost their shot. She kissed him until her face flushed and she had to catch her breath, giggling now with new adrenaline and affection.

She poked at his shoulder, smiling. This was all still so weird and confusing, but they could deal with those things. "Okay so now that I'm not panicking that I lost my boyfriend, what happened? You were stuck in another world? What did you do there outside of that big fight you mentioned?" Squall doing something other than being a SeeD! She couldn't picture it.

Squall kissed her back, and he could count the number of times they had kissed on his fingers, so two in one day? This was a whole new world and a whole new chance for them. He was blushing when he pulled back, but a lot of the weight between them felt lifted. He had a lot to fill her in on, but they were mostly on the same page now. It made him feel better.

He smiled back, almost shyly, as he took a seat next to her. It was tight, but he didn't think she would mind.

"Another world--worlds. A whole universe of worlds, unknown to one another, but connected by secret doors. I helped King Mickey to find the Keyblade wielder who could lock those doors, and once we did that, we started working on rebuilding." He reached for something in his back pocket out of habit before realizing he didn't have a back pocket or the card within it.

So much for the 'Restoration Committee.'

She didn't mind at all. She cuddled in close when he did, sneaking her arm into his and holding his hand. Now he was going to explain a few things, and she was ready to listen and not be as panicked as she was at first. No time had passed for her, so there was nothing to tell him about. Just learn what happened to him in those six years. She already knew she wanted him to keep the hair. It was really cute. Or maybe it was just him in general.

She listened intently. "Why did you need to close the doors? Wouldn't it be interesting to be able to explore different ones?" Rinoa tended to ask questions a lot; she was inquisitive by nature and she knew it could get annoying after too long, but by now he was used to it. They were in a new world now, so not every change was good, she can tell that already. But still! If they could explore them by choice, that was exciting. But then bad people could do it too, which wasn't good.

It was weird talking so much without information in return. Of course, there was always more to know about Rinoa--her past, her hopes, her dreams--but it wasn't like a sudden six-year gap. He was going to have to talk. A lot.

Thankfully, she asked questions. That helped Squall talk. He covered her hand with his other one. "Interesting, yes. And some people could. But the roads between worlds were full of darkness. They were too dangerous to cross, and there were creatures called Heartless who were using the open paths to destroy the worlds and take hearts." He shook his head. "The way to stop them was to lock the paths between worlds, and stop them from getting to Kingdom Hearts, the heart of all worlds."

Rinoa shared some things with Squall, more than she'd shared with anyone else so far, but there was still a lot they had to learn about each other. And now she had a whole lot of background experience to figure out. Their relationship was still pretty new to both of them, even with a big year difference for him. She really was looking forward to developing that, this being her first serious adult relationship. She didn't count her and Seifer as it was brief and shallow.

She was a great audience, because her eyes widened when Squall talked about the darkness, and then said a quiet oh no! when he explained what the Heartless planned to do. That was so awful. "Kingdom Hearts," she echoed thoughtfully. It really did sound like an exciting adventure and she was disappointed on another level now that she apparently missed out! "Wait, did that happen to our world? Is that why you got stuck? What does that mean for all of us?" She had many people she loved back there, and if the Heartless attacked them, she was going to find a way to fight them! Yes, even from here!

He had almost forgotten just how expressive she was. He almost stopped to assure her that everything would be okay, but then again, they were here now, not in that world. Whatever was happening there was in the hands of Sora and the others now.

"It did. I failed us," he admitted, the weight still on his shoulders. That's why he had gone by Leon. "But we closed the doors, and restored the lost hearts. The worlds were coming back together." Theirs would, too. It would be okay.

Rinoa was very expressive. She was terrible at hiding a single emotion, and that was something maybe she'd learn with time. It used to frustrate her father when they'd be at functions and she didn't bother to hide her disdain for some of the snobby people there. A general's daughter should be more polite and schooled, he scolded her. She could turn it on if she wanted to, but it felt wrong. And she never had to do that with Squall. The only time she tried to hide from him was when she fell in love with him and still had no idea how he felt.

"Oh, Squall, don't put that on yourself." He was going to no matter what she did, but she was going to try to convince him otherwise. "If it happened, we all failed." He wasn't the only person in their world who was supposed to protect it. They defeated the sorceress, but they still had a responsibility to keep fighting. "And look, you made it right even without us." She brushed a hand through his hair sweetly. "I wish you wouldn't be so hard on yourself."

Squall didn't want her to hide her emotions or anything else from him. But it was hard to balance wanting to see her reactions and not wanting to see any pain in her face.

He shook his head. "I was the commander. It's my fault." That was military logic for him. Whether or not he really deserved to be commander (he didn't) was another question.

But that was all before this. It was much easier to stomach now that he could feel her fingers in his hair. His heart skipped a beat, and he closed his eyes briefly. "I made it right for you. You all will come back." Sooner or later. He had faith in that.

Rinoa sighed and she knew there was no arguing on this. He was going to blame himself no matter what. That was his way. He was so responsible and it was one of the things she loved about him. "If Cid or someone else was Commander, would you blame them entirely for what happened? Because I feel like you'd still find a way to blame yourself first." She poked his cheek playfully. Her Squall.

"We got through a lot, we can get through this too." Whether she was talking about them losing their world to these Heartless people, or what they were doing right this minute, she wasn't sure. Possibly both. Rinoa leaned in to kiss him sweetly. She was really liking that she felt like she could do that, because getting him to this comfort level took a while. And apparently time apart made him warm up to it too. It was all worth it though.

"This village looks so lived in." From what she saw on their walk. "Are there ... native villagers here, or is everyone like us?"

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There you were, with that look on your face

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