sixthiterationlogs | "I don't get particularly friendly with new people at first go .."

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"I don't get particularly friendly with new people at first go .." - Sanjay Dutt

WHO: Jyn Erso
WHERE: The Inn
WHEN: February 9, early evening.
OPEN TO: Sansa, Claire
WARNINGS: None yet; will edit as needed.
STATUS: From aforementioned characters.

A routine has been slowly established: wake up at first light, comfortably and warmly nestled in Cassian's arms; begrudgingly force herself from their safety and from the bed; prepare for the day, sometimes with him if he feels like waking when she does; go to the Inn, visit Kira if he's there to check on him; if he's there, talk about their previous day, maybe have tea, maybe just sit and mope together; study the map on the wall and determine what new intel needs to be added. She hasn't yet begun to venture out to the boundaries of the town, not yet, but that day is fast approaching. It isn't that she's necessarily looking for an escape (the motivation to do so has waned she since's found Cassian, an underlying fear that if they do try to leave, they won't be able to do so together). It's more that it gives her something to do, something familiar and something like normalcy.

There's no threat of the Empire here. There's no planet killer, there's no Man in White. But she can't shake the anxiety from the back of her mind, where it's made its home. It's a constant gnawing at her gut, an ache in her side - a shroud stitched of darkness and fear and self-preservation. It makes her sometimes pull away from Cassian when he holds her, ignoring the pain, the hurt that flashes in his eyes when she does. It makes her withdraw into herself into silence, despite her tongue's protestations of wanting to move. It makes her lose herself in the crudely drawn map for hours at a time, and it's only the ache in her shoulders that reminds her it's time to go home.

For Claire
She's trying to plot the path she'll take when the expedition finally begins, but she's finding herself distracted by everything, unable to concentrate. She collapses into a nearby chair, fingers pinching the bridge of her nose to will away the pain that's beginning to split into her skull. A heavy sigh the weight of a boulder bursts from her mouth as she closes her eyes, trying to regain the focus she's lost.

For Sansa
She's lost in the imaginary expedition when she hears the distinct sound of slow, hobbling footsteps. There's a light thud as a body falls into a chair. The sounds are enough to draw Jyn's eyes away, for a moment, to see a young woman - girl? - sitting nearby, looking rather frail and possibly even injured. Jyn first notes the burning auburn cascading down her shoulders, then the pain-stricken contortion on her face. The part of her that wants to focus on the map tells her to ignore the girl, it's none of her business. The part of her that remembers the kindness Finnick and Kira showed her after her arrival makes her expression soften as she asks:

"You all right?"

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"Try rubbing your temples a little bit. That or I can show you where to press on the back of your neck to get rid of a potential headache." Claire drops into the chair across from the woman who has been staring at something for way too long now. She had been watching for a little while now but she hadn't wanted to interrupt until she found the perfect opening to do so. Like right now.

Waiting until the woman looks up, she smiles before lifting her hands. "It's just a suggestion."

Jyn had heard the approach, trained ears keen on hearing anything to threaten the personal bubble (or safety, for that matter), but hadn't banked on the maker of the sound to actually .. sit near her. Or speak to her. Or acknowledge her. Or maybe that's just Jyn's wishful thinking.

The words lure her out of the trance she's fallen into in which she resorted back to old battle tactics of counting and meditating to help re-center. She's a little (perhaps very) irritated by the woman's interruption, but she's still able to see through the fog of her disapproval to catch the meaning behind what she says. Rub the temples, or there's some spot on the back of the neck ..

The fingertips of her pointer and middle fingers move up to that subtle canyon of her temple, applying firm pressure, before assuming a circular motion. It helps slightly, but it isn't enough to chase away the pain entirely.

"Where?" she asks, without clarifying. She means to ask, 'where's the spot?' But it sounds too much like asking for help, and so the question is shortened to one word. It sounds less like a request and more like a command that way.

The way that Sansa had collapsed into the chair caused her to jostle her hip more than she cared to admit and left the girl gripping the arms of the chair while she battled down a noise of pain. The effort left her pale and clammy, looking almost ill for a second or two until she could push it down. She knew already that she had pushed herself too far by coming to the Inn already but she hated to be laying in bed with nothing to do and yet it would have been preferable in that moment.

Blowing out a shaky breath, she was just forcing herself to relax when she heard someone speaking softly nearby. Opening her eyes, she focused on the woman who was watching her and realized that she must have let it show too much that she was in pain. Not that she knew how to block it out. Being as hurt as she was reminded her that she was still soft. Yes, she could lie and pretend but she wasn't used to pain. A strange thing to realize considering the things she had suffered at Joffrey's hands.

"I'm..." She was embarrassed when her voice actually wavered and she stopped in favor of clearing her throat before speaking as clearly as she could muster. "I'm fine. My hip and leg are....sore."

Jyn can see that she's breached a topic the woman doesn't care to speak about. She doesn't blame her; in fact, she can recognize a bit of herself in the way the stranger steels her nerves, buries her embarrassment, attempts to ignore the pain. Jyn would've done the same, if the roles were reversed. She would've gritted her teeth and protested her wellness, probably do something idiotic to go the full mile.

So she respects the pause, the attempts to find strength as the woman breathes calmly.

She can also see past the facade.

With a slight nod, she leaves to go to the bar and returns moments later with a large flagon of something that smells - well, fermented. And strong. She hadn't ordered anything specific. Her only requirements were, 'to help with pain.' She sets it down on the table where Sansa is, flicks her head as a silent way of saying, 'this should help,' then goes back to the map on the wall, wanting to give the woman some space.

Sansa is almost relieved when the woman walks away without a word but she can't help feeling guilty a moment later. The woman had merely shown concern over her apparent pain and Sansa had rebuffed it out of habit. All because she had found that hiding her pain and reaction was better than letting someone know the truth. Not that she has to worry about someone ridiculing her or trying to hurt her further but some habits are hard to break.

That guilt deepens a little when the woman returns with a large flagon of something that smells almost too foul to drink but Sansa recognizes it for what it is. Cupping the drink between her hands, she looks up as she murmurs a soft thank you and watches her step away again.

Still watching, she lifts the flagon to her lips, holds her breath and then takes a long sip. It burns the back of her throat and all the way down to her stomach when she swallows but she suspects it will numb the pain after awhile. After another sip, she drums up the courage to speak.

"I apologize if I seemed rude before." A slight pause. "I was struck by lightning and I have been a little on edge ever since."

Jyn folds her arms across her chest as she plots out her imaginary route on the map. She'd been told that the landscape was known to change based on who was investigating - that alone intrigues her, aside from the fact that there seems to be no logical explanation for her being here. For having disintegrated on Scarif only to wake in the water of the fountain. She wasn't complaining, necessarily (especially given the fact that she and Cassian were now gifted a future they'd had snatched out of their hands), but she wants to make sense of it all.

Or try to, at least.

She's still aware of the woman, can see her movements out of the corner of her eye without looking like she's leering. She sees her pick up the drink, force some down her throat. She's grateful for it, hopeful it will help soothe some of the aches in the woman's injured body.

She doesn't expect the apology, though - and it's something Jyn's not so skilled at receiving. Her eyes move before her head towards the red-haired woman, and there's a slight look of awkwardness that flashes across Jyn's face. She decides to ignore the apology and instead focus on the latter information.

"Struck by lightning? Where?"

Upon seeing the flash of awkwardness, Sansa hesitates before glancing down at the drink between her hands. It seems that she is feeling somewhat awkward as well but only because she is not used to showing pain or people trying to help her. At least not without some ulterior motive.

"Outside my home." She answers, looking up again before she realizes that might not be what the woman means. "I think it hit me right about here. I am...burned here."

She waves a hand over her right hip and down over her thigh.

Claire is probably aware of the fact that she has annoyed the woman by interrupting her but she doesn't really acknowledge it either. She believes that the interruption is a good thing because it forces the woman to take a break and address her growing headache. It would be better to do so sooner rather than later, after all. Then, if needed, Claire will leave her alone again.

Watching as the woman tries to ease her headache by rubbing her temples first, Claire smiles a little to show her that she is doing it right but doesn't seem surprised that it isn't completely effective.

"Here." Shifting to turn in her chair so the woman can see the back of her head, she lifts her hands and presses her thumbs against the base of her skull on either side of her spine. "Rub here and tilt your head back a little while you do. It might not take a headache away completely depending on how bad it is but it should at least help the feeling that your eyes might fall out of your head if you continue staring at something."

The news worries her; she'd been paying particular attention to the weather, as it affects how quickly she can attend to the traps she and Cassian had laid out, as well as how likely it is that there'd be anything in them. And, given the fact that all of the now "luxuries" from home - weapons, gear, protective equipment - were no longer present, she's been slightly more hesitant to simply go running about if the need isn't there.

Jyn's eyes flicker to the spot that the woman gestures to, then nods her understanding.

"When did it happen?"

Jyn observes the woman as best she can, though the ache behind her eyes is severe enough that she has to squint slightly. She takes her thumbs, finds what she thinks is the spot (it is), and begins to imitate what the woman had done before. She angles her head back slightly as instructed, closes her eyes.

As the woman predicted, it doesn't take the stabbing pain away entirely - but it does help, more than Jyn had anticipated. She exhales a tiny sound of relief as some of the pressure at her forehead and in her eyesockets fades, just a bit. She knows she hasn't been sleeping enough (for a woman who's had dreamless nights for the majority of her life, the nightmares don't stop here), she knows that the whole transition to the town has been - well, exhausting, to say the least. Not in bad ways, necessarily, but - exhausting all the same.

She opens her eyes, flits them over to the woman with a softer gaze now. Her lips twitch an appreciative smile.

"Where'd you learn all this?"

It's easy enough to see the moment when the technique works or at least works just enough to take the edge of the headache away. If she had them, she might have offered the woman some pain killers but she didn't have those supplies here.

"When I started my training as a nurse." She answers with a tiny bit of a shrug. "Not everyone likes to take something when their head starts to hurt, so a doctor friend I knew passed on a few tricks that I could share with them. If it gets really bad, I would suggest closing your eyes for awhile and resting so it won't get worse."

"Yesterday morning." This time her voice is softer than before because she is already anticipating the woman reacting and telling her that she should be resting. She is pretty sure that her brothers and sister would say the same thing if they had caught her going out. She had needed to do it, though. Somewhat because she was feeling tired and restless but also because she didn't want to be too frightened to go outside again.

Now that she has completed the walk to the Inn, she kind of wishes that she had stayed in bed and just worked through the misery because the pain is worse. "I know...I should have stayed home."

A nurse. Jyn's still adjusting to the concept of there being mostly humans who take care of these sorts of things, rather than med droids. There's something in the way the woman speaks, her nurturing nature, that vaguely reminds Jyn of her mother - but as quickly as the realization comes, she forces it away, back into the dark shadows of her mind. She knows that associating this stranger with anything like her mother will be a perilous path to walk along.

"Any suggestions for being able to sleep better at night?" She won't mention the nightmares, there's no need to, but the tone of her voice indicates that it isn't just a matter of falling and staying asleep.

Jyn's eyebrows gather at the middle, her eyes intent on the young woman's face. They float back down to her hip, imagining what the scar and injury might look like, before finding her eyes again. Something in Jyn's expression softens then - her brows return, her eyes grow warm, her lips are slightly parted.

"You seem more than capable of making your own decisions," she replies quietly. "I wouldn't have been able to stay in the same place for long, either. Even if it made more sense to stay put." Which is true. Jyn had been reprimanded more times than she could count for not allowing her injuries to heal completely before attempting to either return to battle or do something stupid, like go for a swim. "Sort of admirable, that you're already out and about with your injury being so recent."

Edited 2017-02-26 23:50 (UTC)

The woman doesn't have to mention nightmares because there is something in her tone that leads Claire close to that option. Maybe it's because she understands having nightmares or trouble sleeping. She had thought it had something to do with her ability but even with it not working the same way? She still doesn't sleep as much as she should.

"Short of prescribing something we don't have?" She shrugs a little before falling silent and thinking. "I knew someone who would meditate whenever he couldn't sleep. Sometimes I would try warm milk but...I'm not sure we have milk here."

Then she offers a little smile. "Have you tried counting sheep?"

"- What are sheep?" Jyn asks, brows stitched together with utter confusion. She's been adjusting to the understanding and realization that the world she comes from - the galaxy she comes from - is very different from the one the others seem to have originated in. There are terms, creatures, foods, countries (instead of planets) that she's never heard of before - so it really shouldn't be a surprised at it anymore. It hasn't helped with her feeling vaguely like an idiot most of the time, though. "And why would you count them in order to fall asleep?"

Sansa is simply too worn out to even try hiding the hint of surprise that crosses her features when the woman declares that she seems more than capable of making her own decisions. It's a statement that she doesn't hear very often but it helps her to relax a bit when she realizes that she won't get scolded for leaving her home so soon after being hurt.

"I'm not sure admirable is the right word but thank you." She is sure that most people would call her foolish but she still manages a small smile before offering her name. "My name is Sansa, by the way. I apologize for not introducing myself sooner."

Jyn takes note of the surprise, imagining that this woman seems perhaps a bit unused to the idea of being in control of her own life, her own decisions. It's not a life with which Jyn is all that familiar, but she'd seen it here and there in her exploits around the galaxy. It was almost always women, too; something about that irked her.

"Of course, I might be encouraging bad behavior," Jyn lightly teases, raising and lowering one shoulder casually. "I've had the word 'stubborn' thrown at me more times than I can recall, so take what I say with some precaution, I suppose." She shakes her head lightly, dismissively. "No apology needed. Sansa, pleasure. Jyn Erso."

Sansa knows all about feeling irked at times over the issue that women never seemed to be as in control of their lives as they should be. She was used to it being her duty as the daughter of a Lord to do whatever was needed and expected of her. Usually, that meant marriage, running a household and having children but she is starting to see now that she can have more. It still takes time getting used to, though.

"To be fair, it's not like I need a lot of encouraging. I seem to be doing well on my own today." Sansa smiles, finding herself amused by the teasing. The conversation is also a pleasing distraction from the echo of pain still clinging to her. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Jyn Erso. Are you new to this place?"

"Oh....uh. They're farm animals that we get wool from. They kind of look like walking cotton balls, sort of." Claire blinks a little as she tries to think of how to explain something so simple but almost stumps her for a moment. Mainly because she is just used to people knowing what sheep are. She feels kind of silly for making the assumption now but she hopes the other woman understands. "I don't know, honestly? They just seem to be associated with sleep but I'm not sure I can actually tell you why. I was taught to imagine them jumping over a fence and counting them until I went to sleep."

"Well, if there's someone who ends up cross with you, I didn't encourage anything," Jyn replies lightheartedly, even quipping a tiny bark of laughter. She can sense the distraction, and though "small talk" is not exactly a forte of hers, she's willing to try if it helps Sansa think less of the pain she's in.

"Yes, I only just arrived - ehm, I think it's been three days," she mutters, trying to remember. "It seems ridiculous I can't give you an exact amount, but it's been - an exhausting few days, I can tell you. What about you? Have you been here long?"

She nods very slowly as her mind scrambles to try and comprehend what it is Claire's saying, but she mostly has no idea. Still, she appreciates the effort - and there's a light behind the jade of her eyes, a manifestation of her gratitude.

The latter comment makes the proverbial bulb go on above Jyn's head, her eyes widening with realization and recognition.

"My mother used to tell me something similar," she explains, "Though it was to imagine Loth-cats jumping over a force field." She pauses, realizes that Claire probably has no idea what a Loth-cat is, just as she (still) has no idea what a sheep is (or a cotton ball). "They're a creature we had in my galaxy. They originated on the planet Lothal. Two pointed ears, a very large mouth with sharp teeth, a thick tail, and very small eyes. They're usually tan with black or brown spots, white belly and muzzle. Some people had them as pets, but they were temperamental, from what my mother told me."

"I promise, I won't even tell them your name or anything about you," Sansa promises, the soft smile still lingering on her features. She is sure that someone will be cross with her but not too much. She is expecting that they won't actually want to upset her in the state she is in and she is willing to use that to her advantage if she needs to. After she apologizes for upsetting them.

"I remember. The days blurred together for me in the beginning too." She waves a hand in dismissal. "Honestly, they still do some days. At least until now when I find myself sentenced to resting in my bed for hours on end. Now it seems like the days drag."

Pausing, she tilts her head while thinking. "I have been here for a few months now. It was just starting to snow when I arrived."

"Really? That's kind of you; I'll have to remember that in the future." Even though it's said in jest, there's a tingle at the back of Jyn's skull that reminds her how rare and good a promise like that is - and she won't be quick to forget it.

"Somewhat comforting to know it isn't just me going through the strange bleeding of time," she mutters, half to herself. "I can't imagine; I've injured myself many, many times over by not listening to orders to stay put. I've never been good at that - listening to orders, staying still." Partially why she couldn't blame Sansa for having done the same exact thing she would've done, had the roles been reversed. "Are there things you could read her? Or something to help take your mind off of the eternity of time?" She thinks to suggest Sabacc or Holochess, then realizes that neither of those things exist here. She's coming up with a blank for alternatives. "So, the climate changes here? Where I'm from, the planets are mono-climate; there are ice planets, tropical planets, desert planets, and so on - it's strange to be in a place where there are seasons."

Jyn was right in thinking that Claire had no idea what a Loth-cat was and the blank look on her face pretty much confirms it until it switches to a look of understanding with the other woman's explanation. "Okay, they sound kind of like cats, maybe? Sort of."

Then she chuckles, tucking some hair back from her face. "But yeah, that is basically the same idea as counting sheep. Either way, I think it's a tactic to trick your kid into going asleep due to just being really, really bored. Unfortunately for me, it never worked. I kind of suck at things like that or meditation."

"I wish I could make the same claim. Unfortunately, I've always been too good at following orders or doing whatever I felt someone wanted me to do. I was very good at...being a little bird who said whatever someone wanted me to say." Her mind drifts back to the Hound and his somewhat cruel words. At least, they had seemed cruel at the time but she doesn't think so now. He had merely been trying to open her eyes through mocking her a little for being the fool she was.

"I think someone might have a book or two." She comes back to the conversation, looking around. "Resources are kind of limited but you could ask Kate? If you don't know her, she is the woman who runs the Inn, I believe. Or at least she is usually here and looking after things. She might know someone if she doesn't have books here herself."

"It seems to so far, from what I hear, but I don't know when or how often. I'm looking forward to it getting warm, though. It will be nice to get out in the sun and not worry about snow or mud. Also, hunting and farming should be better."

"Er, I assume so - seeing as they have the same use of the word 'cat' in their name. Perhaps your 'cats' are our 'loth-cats,' or the opposite." Jyn hadn't, for some reason, considered there'd be different non-humanoid creatures in various galaxies; of course, she hadn't thought much beyond the boundaries of her own galaxy before now.

A quiet laugh bursts from Jyn's mouth, which she quickly covers with the side of her hand by her thumb.

"I always assumed it had to do with the monotonous repetition - keeps the active, scattered mind in line and controlled. But your theory sounds much more plausible." A pause. "Meditation has never been a particular strong-suit of mine, either." She gestures vaguely back towards the map and then to her head. "Hence the headache."

"We adapt as it is demanded of us," Jyn replies carefully, hearing the self-directed resentment in Sansa's voice. Sometimes she wonders if she could've ever been tamed enough to have heeled at her parents' words, or if she'd inherited far too much of her mother's spirit - fiery, bright, stubborn - to have ever led that sort of life. Even if things had worked out differently.

"I meant for you," she explains warmly. "To help you pass the time. The suggestions I'd make aren't - well, they don't really make sense here." There's a vague sense of never having learned to play Sabacc back when she'd had the chance. She also understands, now, why the rest of the insurgents had played it so often - it was a distraction. Mindless, amusing, attention-needy. Anything to keep their minds from wandering into dark places.

"Did you do those things? Back where you come from?"

"It was a way to survive." Sansa replies thoughtfully, somewhat to herself, before glancing at the woman again. She knows that the conversation is veering quickly into a direction that she likes to avoid and so she makes herself smile while focusing on the next bit.

"I apologize." She states sheepishly. "I misunderstood that and thought you were asking for yourself. I hadn't thought about it for me, though. I don't remember the last time I just sat down and read a book for fun. I could ask Kate."

Then she chuckles ever so softly, thinking about her life back home. "Farming and hunting? No. I would like to learn so that I can be helpful, so I asked a friend of mine to teach me how to fish and my brother says that he can teach me to hunt. Do you know how to do either?"

"No need for an apology. You've been through a lot," Jyn flickers her eyes over where she'd indicated the lightning earlier, "It's all right." A surprisingly soft voice for Jyn Erso, but perhaps something about this place is turning her softer, just a little bit. "It could be something to pass the time, at least. I can always see what I can find, ask around."

There's a tug at the corner of Jyn's lips as she nods.

"I do, fortunately or unfortunately a matter of opinion. It's easy enough to learn, once you've been been in enough battles."

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"I don't get particularly friendly with new people at first go .." - Sanjay Dutt

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