3ofswords (
3ofswords) wrote in
sixthiterationlogs2017-09-01 01:40 pm
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[closed] gravity won’t get you through the mazes
WHO: Kira Akiyama
WHERE: House 39
WHEN: September 15 [predated]
OPEN TO: Bodhi Rook
WARNINGS: N/A
Long as the trek was, and dangerous as life alone could be beyond the bounds of civilization, Kira isn’t sure he’d do it any differently. The other option would have been disappearing each day into the south of the canyon, relying on someone else to have food and relative shelter ready every time he returned. He would have been too reachable, too burdensome--and too bored.
He could have taken Tim with him. Hell, he probably could have taken Bodhi with him, if he’d just told the man they were going with little enough notice for excuses. But Bodhi had been difficult to be around in his own right--the drifting, the insecurity. Bodhi is a man without armor. He dodges, he retreats. Maybe sometimes he even absorbs--but he doesn’t hold. Kira, if he’s honest, hasn’t had his armor since he crawled through the fountain. Hasn’t had his armor since Ty moved him out of his apartment, put him in the base, and left without heeding his warnings.
The best armor is someone else to wear it, really, but nothing works that way here. Other people can’t stand between him and the feelings of more people. Other people can’t give him the energy to live, trying to process them all at once.
It isn’t a slight on Bodhi. It isn’t even really a slight on Tim, much as it seemed to turn into one--and he makes the house his first destination when he wakes up with those senses dulled back to nothing. He can’t trust that it will last, not after the few days before it came back stronger than before, but he can use the time to check in, shore up some kind of social or edible currency, make it--make it something like okay, when he has to do it again.
Kira dodges too. Tim might be the first person he really explained it to, and only because he backed himself so deep in a corner, his claws were stuck in the wood, useless for defense. Bodhi’s been with him even longer, keeping up the house, keeping it from being a place Kira shares with ghosts.
He owes it to the man not to become one, even just in habit. “Bodhi,” he calls, letting the animals and himself in through the working back door. Aurora trots deeper in the house, gently wuffing her own greeting, letting Kira know he’s caught Bodhi at home. He puts Hoshi on the back of a chair, slinging his pack down onto the table. His clothes need a better wash than they can get in a lake, but he’s kept himself fed, stayed in a house on the other side, and the restfulness of getting away sits well on him.
It’s no match for the restfulness of feeling nothing at all, standing in a house with another occupant.
WHERE: House 39
WHEN: September 15 [predated]
OPEN TO: Bodhi Rook
WARNINGS: N/A
Long as the trek was, and dangerous as life alone could be beyond the bounds of civilization, Kira isn’t sure he’d do it any differently. The other option would have been disappearing each day into the south of the canyon, relying on someone else to have food and relative shelter ready every time he returned. He would have been too reachable, too burdensome--and too bored.
He could have taken Tim with him. Hell, he probably could have taken Bodhi with him, if he’d just told the man they were going with little enough notice for excuses. But Bodhi had been difficult to be around in his own right--the drifting, the insecurity. Bodhi is a man without armor. He dodges, he retreats. Maybe sometimes he even absorbs--but he doesn’t hold. Kira, if he’s honest, hasn’t had his armor since he crawled through the fountain. Hasn’t had his armor since Ty moved him out of his apartment, put him in the base, and left without heeding his warnings.
The best armor is someone else to wear it, really, but nothing works that way here. Other people can’t stand between him and the feelings of more people. Other people can’t give him the energy to live, trying to process them all at once.
It isn’t a slight on Bodhi. It isn’t even really a slight on Tim, much as it seemed to turn into one--and he makes the house his first destination when he wakes up with those senses dulled back to nothing. He can’t trust that it will last, not after the few days before it came back stronger than before, but he can use the time to check in, shore up some kind of social or edible currency, make it--make it something like okay, when he has to do it again.
Kira dodges too. Tim might be the first person he really explained it to, and only because he backed himself so deep in a corner, his claws were stuck in the wood, useless for defense. Bodhi’s been with him even longer, keeping up the house, keeping it from being a place Kira shares with ghosts.
He owes it to the man not to become one, even just in habit. “Bodhi,” he calls, letting the animals and himself in through the working back door. Aurora trots deeper in the house, gently wuffing her own greeting, letting Kira know he’s caught Bodhi at home. He puts Hoshi on the back of a chair, slinging his pack down onto the table. His clothes need a better wash than they can get in a lake, but he’s kept himself fed, stayed in a house on the other side, and the restfulness of getting away sits well on him.
It’s no match for the restfulness of feeling nothing at all, standing in a house with another occupant.
no subject
With one hand, he placates; with the other, he riles. A bit like rubbing Aurora's fur the wrong way before he brushes it flat again. "And if by some miracle we get out, you can come haunt my apartment as long as you need. I like knowing you, I'm not wishing to get out of that."
no subject