"Enough that it makes me wonder if there is some form of escape and we're just not finding it," she says, which means that she feels like she's somehow failing. If she were better, then she would be back in Los Angeles. The trouble is that every once in a while, someone comes here that makes her rethink her will to leave.

"Perhaps there's something we don't understand," she says. "Maybe they're all still here and we haven't searched long enough." If that's the case, she thinks that her guilt will consume her, if she's left Steve out there twice.