"If you do not know how highly I think about you, then we don't talk enough," Cougar replies pointedly, because he still thinks that Jake is teasing him a little. He moves the pad of his thumb slowly over Jake's knuckles and taps twice against his palm. "Look," he says, sliding into the big stuff.

"I'm bad at showing this, yes. Before, I couldn't. We could not tell, if asked. And so I just made sure you would not find permanency with anyone else." He shrugs, all the apology Jake will get. Releasing his hand, he knows that it's not the most honourable of actions. "I'm not sure I deserve to ask for a chance."