"Psychological warfare," Nida says after he takes the dishtowel to dab at his eyes. "My parents were also Galbadian deserters. Apparently Fury Caraway believed it would be best to make an example of them. Really, it was a beautifully set up blow, one I would do if I was asked to destabilize a village in that situation."

And that's what scares him. That he gets it. That he understands it. That he'd do it. Because in some ways he is that Garden drone. And that's what he's scared of. Going back and becoming that. Squall arriving again and becoming that. Because it's easier. Because it was what he was raised to be. It's the weapon he was forged into.

"I tried to do what they teach us, when I saw it. After I screamed my throat raw, I tried to shut down as the rest came back. Analyze. Internalize. Shunt off to the side. And it keeps happening, when I'm not expecting it. It creeps up on me, and says it would be easier to be like that. To distance yourself and not feel all this. And then, this morning..."

He raises his hand to gesture at the meal they're making.

"My favorite. My dad cooked it for me. Which I only know because they sent me a video of it. I don't know whether it's real, but it feels like it. I showed it to Billy earlier like... like it was the most precious thing in the world."