freightcars: (Tʜᴀᴛ's ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ɪᴛ ʜᴜʜ?)
ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪɴᴛᴇʀ sᴏʟᴅɪᴇʀ ([personal profile] freightcars) wrote in [community profile] sixthiterationlogs 2018-09-17 02:05 am (UTC)

He starts shaking his head the second the world fault leaves Tony's lips, a steady back and forth, a constant stream of denial that doesn't waver for a second even as his fingers tighten precariously on an empty glass. Romania. Siberia. They're one thing, but the god damn dirt road hits so hard that a little chnk sounds from the glass, a hairline fracture where it's starting to give beneath his grip that spreads like spiderwebs around the crystal.

"Shut up," He mutters again, just before 1991 comes out. The crashing of a car full-speed into a tree, he can hear it - it's a perfect audio recreation in his mind, the screeching of brakes and the crumpling of metal, and his ears ring with tinnitus. Help my wife, please- Sargeant Barnes? Howard-

It's the whiskey.

"Shut up- !" He doesn't register throwing the glass, doesn't register standing or whirling or hurling it with any great force, but does plainly register the way that it slams into a shelf of other glasses, and the way they all shatter their way to the floor.

A silent beat.

And then he's back, back under rigid control, ducking his eyes and turning his head and taking a breath. Passing a hand over his mouth, because the onslaught of shame comes startlingly quick. Probably the second it left his hand. Shit. He's got a lot of messes to clean up, and he's not sure which one to address first. Executive dysfunction, a rigidness in his spine, a faltering gaze, until finally he can lift his eyes enough to level Tony with a head-on look and murmur a frigid, cracked, sincere, "I'm sorry."

Which- there's that word he swore five minutes ago he was never going to say. Broken glass, broken promises. Funny how he says it after he's already been given the pass.

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