I pause, rolling my eyes as I attempt to wipe the dust from my nose and succeed in just adding more on. "I would point out that it was a joke, and thank you for being fucking pedantic, but coconuts in a deciduous forest would be one of the least weird things about this place," I call back.

And lo, I've found some shoes. They are barely hanging on and were definitely not crafted with fashion in mind to begin with, but it's better than nothing.

"I found you some ugly footwear," I yell, and gently extract myself from the plume of decay so I can make my way back. "They might fall apart."