Bodhi shifts from biting his lip to his knuckles to keep himself grounded. He's onboard with relaxing for Jude, but he's still fighting himself without question. Giving up control, letting go of any of the tension feels like surrender. And what the fuck is the matter with him, thinking like this? Jude is gorgeous and sweet and they've been at this all night and he can't manage this one thing?

Because what he needs right now is performance anxiety on top of everything.

Focus on Jude. He can't relax into himself, but maybe he can forget to worry about how long this is taking, about how Jude deserves better and might feel like Bodhi doesn't want--

Just Jude. The hand he's not biting down on remains in Jude's hair for a moment and then drifts down his cheek, and some of the edge dulls. He missed too much worrying, but he does calm down in time to catch Jude teasing him with his tongue. That, more than anything, lets him let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding, let go of the tension in his jaw. He's not quite there, but he's not fighting the very possibility. "Baby..."