"I don't want to imagine that, I will have nightmares," he guarantees, grimacing as he considers some of the people around the village that he doesn't even want to see with their shirt off, let alone with only nipples poking out, which just makes him wish he hadn't brought it up in the first place.

"See, no, no, I don't want to imagine nipples of any kind, that's just horrifying."

He makes a face and feels like his whole background is being attacked, though, giving Major a disbelieving look. "Can we not ruin my love of Downton Abbey while also giving me nightmares? I'd appreciate it, really."